First Comes (body) Love

Every time I see something about body love and body shame, I instantly become conflicted. 

I think big girls, little girls, fat girls, thin girls, tall girls, short girls, purple girls, blue girls can all be beautiful.

I think that it is impossible to know health by size alone. (I'm much healthier than some much smaller girls I've met.)

I think taking steps to be healthy is important for all people.

I think (or actually know) that for some (me) it is REALLY hard to drop body fat no matter how hard you try, and it is just plain discouraging.

I think (or actually know) that people who think it's easy or who have never struggled to lose weight (losing weight and struggling to lose weight are different) typically don't get it all, and can (not always) be way more discouraging than encouraging. 

All that being said, here's my thought...

Before anyone can change, they first have to love and accept themselves enough to change. They have to decide that they love themselves no matter what size they are, but they want to be healthier. They also have to realize that the scale may be slow to change, and be ok with that because they love themselves anyway. 

In order for people to encourage others to change, they too have to love first. They have to love and accept their friends and family for who they are. They have to understand its freaking hard. They have to encourage and never shame. (Social Worker Stefani says that shame NEVER creates change.) They have to lead by example and support (Cook healthy for them, eat healthy when you eat with them, suggest fun active activities when you hang out, etc.) They also have to realize that it may take time for their friend or family member to get to a point that they are ready to make the effort to change, and love them despite that. 

I think everyone should love themselves and be healthy, but that's a personal journey and no one gets to express an opinion about either. IF someone reaches out to you for help or guidance, walk beside them and help them, but don't judge them and don't express your opinion unless you're specifically asked. 

Let's be honest, there are few things more hurtful than "healthy people" telling you how wrong you are to be "unhealthy." Especially when they have no idea what your struggles really are.  It's not always a matter of eating right and working out more. There are sometimes biological and psychological factors in play. 

So, I guess what I'm really saying is to stop reducing yourself and others to the shape of your or their bodies. A person is so much more than that. Encourage health, take steps towards health, love yourself, and just enjoy life!