Resolutions!

First of all 60 more people read my "Announcement" post then almost any other post ever. That makes me laugh! Haha! Suckas! 

Resolution #1: I will have COMPASSION for all of the people I work with, and will work to understand their perspective. I will accept what I cannot control, and do my best to devise the best solution possible with the resources necessary.

Resolution #2: I will make the healthiest food choices in any situation. 

Resolution #3: I will not touch candy, chips, or soda (unless mixed with alcohol on occasion) for an entire year. I also will not order delivery for myself, by myself. (These are all things I can and should live without.)

Resolution #4: I will not make unplanned purchases and will not use my credit cards unless it is absolutely necessary. (This is the hardest one.)

Man, 2013 has been fantastic! I'm excited for 2014! Hope the rest of your year is fantastic! 

PS: I'm totes gonna be the loser who says "See you next year!" Lol

Announcement!

Well, I wasn't sure how to tell the world this... You can all judge me if you please... But I don't care... The fact of the matter is that in 27 Days I will... 

TURN 25!!!

Psh, what did you think I was going say?

Like 100 days ago I was going to write 5 things I was grateful everyday... Ummm... I did that for a while... then I lost my notebook. WHOMP WHOMP... 

BUT I will be counting down to my 25th Birthdays with daily pics starting January 1st! 25 days of pictures that represent my life at 25. 

The trick? There will be no captions or hashtags (I know, hold the phone!) other than the day of the pic. #Day1 for example. There may be one pic in the day or 20. I do what I want. I won't comment on the pics either. 

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and I feel like being a mysterious bitch. You're welcome. Put on your party pants! Only 2 days 'til this party gets started. 

PS: I hope I tricked you into reading things, because I like being a trickster! 

Stay-Cation + Resolution #1

Welp, my 10 day stay-cation is (almost) over... This is almost something to cry over, but I won't cry. Nope, nope!

It was a fantastic 10 days. I did not wear jeans or work pants one time! I'm pretty proud of myself. Haha.

I had a fantastic Christmas with a fantastic family, and got to have some fun times with great friends!

All year I've been looking back on my life a year ago, and it's INSANE to me that I'm the same person in the same place. I cannot tell you how miserable I was last year. I mean, I've told you, but words cannot truly explain how I felt.

I haven't told a lot of people this, but I actually was given a legitimate opportunity to move to Boise this past month. I could have been living in Boise by the end of January. It would have been a lateral move within my agency. I turned down this opportunity. It just didn't feel right. My house was a hurdle, but probably could have been easily overcome. The cost of living there opposed to here was a hurdle, but that also could have been dealt with. It was one of those things that just didn't feel right. Just didn't sit right. There were so many reasons to stay here! Living close to my family, my fantastic friends, CrossFit and the opportunities I have at my box, my office and the people I work with, and the list could go on forever. I knew it wasn't right, but still kind of wondered if I would regret it. Well, I think the last 10 days I've really realized how absolutely LUCKY I am to be here! That's right... I've moved from "This place isn't as bad as I thought" to being so, so LUCKY to be where I'm at. For the first time since probably my junior year in high school, I feel settled. Really settled. I don't feel the need to search for something or to look for something better. I don't feel like I'm lacking anything. That's not to say I'm stagnant. It's just my personality to be moving upward and onward (if you know my mom you'll get this), but it's not a frantic searching for something better. I truly am at peace with who I am, where I'm at, and where I'm going. I'm confident in my decisions, and am rarely concerned about what others think of my decisions. I've realized that I have to do what's best for me. Gah! I'm so great! JUST KIDDING... but for real. I'm a real catch. Tell your friends. Haha... I'm glad I'm not going anywhere for a while. Not to say I won't ever move, but it won't be in January!

That being said I'm still a little anxious to go back to work. As of this moment I have 94 e-mails to check. I'm terrified. It was not a "convenient" time to go on vacation. But it was scheduled and Lord knows I needed it. I think that one thing I need to work on at work is not getting so worked up about situations that stress me out. I'm a passionate person. And when you're working with people and their lives, sometimes it's hard not get your whole heart involved in things. There are a few things that reign true at my work though...
1. I have guidelines to follow. I cannot work outside of those guidelines, no matter how much I want to.
2. Though I work with professionals, many of them have flaws just like I have my flaws.
3. Many of the clients have a very different world view than I have had or will ever had. Their perception of the world is completely different than mine.

This leads me to my first New Year's Resolution...

Resolution #1: I will have COMPASSION for all of the people I work with, and will work to understand their perspective. I will accept what I cannot control, and do my best to devise the best solution possible with the resources necessary.

Cheers to the New Year!

(More Resolutions to Come)

Resolution Complete! + Some favy foods!

So, for the first time in my life I have successfully completed a New Years Resolution! Whoa!

WELL, actually it was a Birthday Resolution. For those of you who have never experienced a birthday with me, you should know I LOVE my birthday! I feel like this is OK, because I also LOVE other people's birthdays. Who doesn't love a good birthday? For those of you who haven't experienced a birthday with me, but know me even semi-well this will be no shock to you. :) 

Anywho, I decided last year that when I turned 25 I would have a better body then I did when I turned 24. 

MISSION FREAKIN' ACCOMPLISHED! 

Just in case you didn't see this... 

The first two were taken in 2012, the last one was December 10, 2013. 

Whoop Whoop! 

So I'm working on my game plan for 2014... BUT I thought I'd share my excitement with you. . 

I also thought I'd share some of my favorite things to eat in case you have resolutions of your own! (And because a friend asked for some ideas, so I decided to share it with the world. You can thank her later!)

These are in no particular order, but I like numbers SO they're numbered. I like numbers not math. If you want to hear about my math you can feel free to talk to Kristin and Becky about the time I decided that 70% of Becky's 1 Rep Max was about 2#. :) I really am smart. 

The Things I Like to Eat: 

1. These Cookies. Seriously, they are like God's gift to earth. If you don't follow PaleOMG on Pinterest, Blogger, Facebook, etc... You should! She makes tons of yummy things AND she's pretty funny. PLUS she CrossFits! You know that's a win in my book! 

2. Roasted veggies. Seriously, anything roasted. Lately I've been roasting cauliflower, broccoli, onions, sweet potatoes,  brussel sprouts, and carrots. They can be found individually or in any combination. I also chop up some bacon and roast it with them, if I'm feeling CRAZY!!! All you gotta do is chop your veggies into bite size pieces and coat your veggies in the oil of your choice. I usually choose olive oil. Then put them on a cookie sheet and cook them in the oven at 400 degrees for 20 minutes. Then pull 'em out, stir 'em around, and throw them back in for 15-20 minutes. They get all yummy and crunchy. Nom! (If you include bacon, just do the same and throw it in with the veggies raw. It'll cook up! You may want to pre-cook it a bit if you like super crispy bacon.)

3. Roasted cabbage. So, it's a little different then above. You slice your cabbage into inch slices. We'll call them "steaks". Then you put olive oil and garlic on one side, flip them over and put olive oil and garlic on the other side. It's OK if it kinda falls apart. All the pieces that are lone rangers get all crispy!!! Nom! You cook it on one side at 400 degrees for 15-20 minutes. Then, take 'em out, flip 'em, and put 'em back in for another 15-20. Seriously, even my brother liked this goodness. 

4. I eat chicken thighs. Gah! I know, I know... I'm supposed to eat chicken breasts. Let me tell you something. I SUCK AT COOKING CHICKEN BREASTS. They are always dry. Freakin' dry! I can't do it. I can't eat it! I will starve rather than eat them. So, I just throw some boneless, skinless thighs on the ol' George Foreman and eat e'em up. 

5. I like to eat Salmon. I usually buy the frozen kind at Costco. Yup, I'm classy. Don't judge me. I'll punch you. 

6. I love soups! Seriously, when I first started eating Paleo it was really hard for me to eat veggies. REALLY HARD. I had really never eaten veggies on a regular basis before. So, I threw a bunch of veggies in the Crock Pot all day, and cooked the shit out of them! Usually I'd use tomatoes, bell peppers, carrots, onions, spinach, garlic, and anything else that I had that I thought might work. When I got home I would throw them all in a blender and blend it up. I'd add some chicken and some chicken stalk. Soup it was! OR I wouldn't thin it out with chicken stalk, and use it as sauce on sketti squash. (AKA: Spaghetti Squash, but I'm a child.)

7. I love Sketti Squash! Here's how I make it. I put in the microwave for 3-5 minutes so it's easy to cut. Then put it in a glass cake pan with about a half of inch of water in it and cook it at 350 for about an hour or so. Then I scoop out the goodness and mix it with some yummy sauce and meat. It's super scrumptious. I even figured out how to set my oven, so I can get the squash ready, and my oven will turn on by itself! Then I come home to ready sketti squash! Nom!

8. I like to eat eggs. Seriously, I just love eggs with runny yolk. Nom! I like them with my roasted veggies especially! 

9. Fruit! Whenever I have a sweet tooth, I mix up those cookies mentioned above, OR I make a fruit salad. Yum! Also, I've found that if you make enough fruit salad, it makes for a nice smoothie in the morning! 

10. Smoothies! I love them! They're great cuz you can put some fats in them with flax or chia seeds. You can also add veggies like carrots or spinach. I usually use frozen fruit and a banana. For liquid I use water, almond milk, or green tea! There's no recipe. I just throw things together and drink up. 

11. The key to eating well is to always be prepared! ALWAYS! For this I love Lara Bars! I really like the cherry, apple, and lemon! Yum! 

12. I also like Stretch Island Fruit Leather for a quick snack! You can buy a BUNCH at Costco. I do have to limit my purchases of this, because I've been known to eat like all of them in a week. #NoShame

13. Cauliflower Mash! So this stuff is so good! First you chop the Cauliflower into bite size pieces and boil it. I usually boil it for like 20 minutes. Then throw it in a blender with some olive oil, garlic, and salt! I also throw some Ghee in there when I have it! (Ghee is clarified butter. It's considered Paleo, though I do know some people at actually butter.)

14. Ceviche! Seriously, this shit is the bomb.com. Simply chop up the following into itty bitty pieces... cucumbers, tomatoes, green onion, shrimp, avocado, peppers of any kind, and perhaps some jalapeno. (And anything else you find yummy and Mexican like.) Then drench it in limes. I use 4+. Depends on my mood. The more lime the better as far as I'm concerned. Add some salt, and eat up! Yummmmmmmm! It's making me want to eat some. If I'm feeling really crazy I put some in tomato juice, and call it shrimp cocktail. I've found that Campbell Tomato Juice isn't terrible for the occasional cocktail. 

15. Veggies and Bacon! When I first started eating veggies, I fried them with bacon! I still like to do this with bell peppers and green beans! Yum!!!

16. Rotisserie chicken is good for a quick dinner! Add it to something, or just eat it plain! 

----------------------------------

I'd like to note that in writing this I realized how boring my diet is! I know I eat other things... I'll let you know what they are when I think of them. Here's a start though! 

Happy New Years Resolutions to all of you! Maybe one of your Resolutions should be to keep your Resolutions, because it sure feels good when you actually do!!!

Oh, and if you need a jump start you should talk to me about an Advocare 24 Day Challenge. I do recommend it as a healthy eating jump start!!!

PS: I'm writing this in my "office"! I cleaned this sucker up so it's ready for my master's program! It's complete with doggy beds and tunes. It'll be fantastic. But I think I need a higher chair for my desk. Or a pillow... 

Dodgin' Bullets!

So it's not nice to laugh at others "misfortunes", AND it's probably wrong to find any kind of pleasure in them. Although, I vote that doesn't count if in this situation... 

That fella I was hangin' out with turned out to be douche. Is there a nicer way to say it??? NOPE!!! And I'm probably an idiot for ever being interested. Story of my life. I have a syndrome I'm going to name... Potential-itis. I tend to see people's potential, but not who they really are. That's so great of me, right? NOT! Cuz let's face it. Sometimes if it looks like a douche, acts like a douche, and talks like a douche, it's probably a douche and not a potential Prince Charming. I think I need to develop a screening team, so that any future dude I talk to has to talk to a series of my friends and family before their permitted to talk to me. (Now taking resumes for the screening team.)

Anyways... Back to the point. So this... lovely man... ended up standing me up. Straight up standing me up. Ass. Yup, no text, no call, no show, no apology. I know, I know, "Stefani that's his loss." Well, duh! But still it doesn't feel nice to be stood up, let alone by someone you'd been hanging out with. Talk about confidence bursting. &&& To get stood up my a douche bag at that!!! (PS: Fellas if you ever do that to a girl imma punch your face.) Obviously I've gotten over it, though there were a few tears. 

So that ended in like October, well yesterday I was informed that the dude had totally effed up things with his job and got the boot. Now, I won't rejoice in the pain he must be in or the fact that his life sucks... But I will say... DODGED THAT BULLET!!! I ain't got no time for that shit! Everything happens for a reason, am I'm kinda in a rockin' place right now. 

But I kinda really think I need a screening team, cuz I coulda been caught up in that mess!!! Takers? 

Also, I've kinda decided that arranged marriages may not be terrible. I'm pretty confident my parents wouldn't settle for anything less than perfect. It seems easier. Dating isn't as fun as it should be. It's kinda hard. It's kinda exhausting. &&&  The pickin' is slim around here. PLUS, then you factor in that I have to find someone who is willing to accept my children, and dating becomes impossible. Being a single chihuahua mom is hard. Especially, with the emotionally damaged one. Oy! 

Anywho, more to some soon on the Single life of Stefani. Maybe that should be what I call my blog. Ha! 

30 Years!!!

So, my parents have been married for 30 YEARS!!! Yup!!! THIRTY!!! Crazy, huh??? In honor of them here are 30 things my parents have taught me about life, marriage, and kids. I hope that I can teach my kids the same lessons some day. Also, remember what you tell your kids makes an impact. I'm sure my parents may not even remember telling me some of these things, but said them... because they're awesome!

1. To avoid divorce, you don't get divorced. Which is almost a direct quote from my mom. One time I asked her how to avoid divorce and she said, "You just don't get divorced." You may not like your spouse everyday. There may be days... maybe weeks... that you don't even want to see their face. However, you stick it out through those times. &&& It turns out it is worth the beautiful times to come.

2. Have fun before kids. We'll get to the "after kids" section in a minute, BUT get your fun out first. My parents were married for 5 years before they had me. My mom said that when they got married people asked when they baby was coming, and she said "In 5 years." Guess who was prego with yours truly exactly 5 years later. In the mean time, they learned to be married and they had fun! From the stories it sounds like they had some pretty good times. I'm sure I only know the half of it, but I know those are fond memories for my parents.

3. When you have kids they are your one and only priority. Ok, that may sound extreme, but it's true. My parents provided everything Jesse and I could ever need and most of everything we wanted. They sacrificed for us more than I think I'll ever know. Seriously, my dad has commuted to the Wood River Valley nearly every day for almost 20 years, so we could grow up in Gooding. If that's not selfless I'm not sure what is.

4. Quality Time > Quantity Time. This kind of ties into number 3. Both of my parents worked most of my life; with the exception of those early years. I never knew any different, and I really don't think that either of us suffered. BECAUSE when my parents weren't working, they were with us. They didn't go out on the weekends. They didn't go hang out with friends and leave us with the babysitter. They were home. When they would need to do things we went or one stayed home with us and the other went. They were actively engaged with us in the process as well. We got plenty of quality time with our parents, and I think we're better  people for it.

5. Give. Yup, it's that simple. If people need your time, you give it. If people need help, you help. If people need money and you have it, you give it. My parents would give the shirt off their backs most days to most people. They've certainly been burned in the process, but they continue to give.

6. Different kids require different parenting. My parents will laugh at this one. Let me tell you how many screaming matches there may have included me saying, "BUT I DIDN'T GET THAT!" or "YOU NEVER LET ME DO THAT!" or "IF I WOULD HAVE DONE THAT!" or "THERE IS SUCH A DOUBLE STANDARD!" The list goes on. Now that I see the products of parents who aren't willing to adjust their parenting styles to their kid, I say, "BRAVO MOM AND DAD! BRAVO!" Because, Jesse and I may look a lot alike, but we're different. For that reason they had to parent us differently.

7. Some rules, you just don't let your kids break. In retrospect, my parents were a lot less strict then I thought they were. I think I was probably more strict with myself then they would have been, but there were some things my parents just weren't down with. One of those things... Do not be late for curfew. Now, I was never late without a phone call. Jesse was late one time. ONE TIME. &&& Our family and his friends will never forget it. Because, when you're late for curfew in the Campa house, they don't wait until you come home... THEY FIND YO' ASS! Also, you don't shoot paintball guns when mom and dad leave you home alone. And no boys in your room. (Don't you fret, I never tested that one, cuz I'm pretty sure Papa Campa would have found his ass too.) There were a lot of other rules we broke and got away with and a lot of week long groundings that lasted 2 days. But, there were some rules we just didn't break.

8. It doesn't matter what "everyone else is doing." I don't even know how often my dad said something along the lines of, "I don't give a shit who's going, you're not." Now, there were times that I didn't get to go places or do things, and nothing bad would have happened if I did. Some of those times, however, legitimately weren't anything I needed to be doing. I got to do a lot of things, but my parents always made sure I was supervised and always made sure that they were appropriate. I certainly didn't get to just roam around town because I wanted to, and I think I avoided a lot of trouble that way. Also, my parents NEVER reinforced the high school mentality of "Everyone is doing, and if you don't do it your a loser." I think that effectively taught us to be independent people this way, and we were able to make good decisions in bad situations because of this.

9. Hard Work. My parents demonstrated excellent work ethic in their jobs, but they also taught us work ethic in our lives. I can't tell you how many times I wanted to quit basketball mid basketball season, and my dad never let me. Why? Because, if you start something you finish it. I could have quit before the season started, but once I stepped into practice for the first day I was committed for the season. It may sound trivial,and may parents just let their kids quite, because "Basketball should be fun." However, through that I learned, that sometimes things suck. Sometimes you don't want to do things, but you have to. For that reason, I learned to work. I have changed jobs throughout my life, but I've always had reasons besides "I don't like it". When I did change jobs I made sure that I wouldn't put myself in a bad financial situation or threw my keys and quit without thinking. &&& When I do work... I work hard. I get my shit done, and I get it done as efficiently as possible. As crazy as it may seem, I think that my dad forcing me to play basketball really impacted me in that way. (PS: I always loved basketball sometimes I just would get frustrated because I was not as talented as I would have liked to be. I think he probably also knew that, and didn't want me to give up something I loved.)

10. Support your kids no matter what. I think that this became especially evident when my brother and I were in our college years. I mean, what parent in their right mind supports their daughter through 2 transfers and 7 degree changes? They never once discouraged me, but encouraged me to do what it took to figure out where I was going. And what parents support their son to get a golf degree? Not many, but my parents did. They saw Jesse's potential, and have helped him to achieve it. Obviously, they were supportive in our younger years, too. We never missed a  sports practice, a dance class, or an activity we wanted to participate in. My parents would take time out of work to make sure we got where we needed to go AND they would come cheer us on at just about every game and activity. I can't even count how many times they came to my basketball games, and watched me sit the bench. If that's not supportive, I'm not sure what is.

11. Marriage requires dependence on each other. I feel like we're entering an age where everyone wants to be independent. I think that there is benefits of being independent. Have you seen me? I'm very proud of my independence. At the same time, marriage is about being dependent on each other. It's about being dependable. It's about being their when your spouse needs you. It's about being able to rely on your spouse when you need them. They are the one person in the world has committed to having your back for life, and you become dependent. I think think it's a beautiful things when two people truly become one. Sure, you have your individuality in some ways, but when people ask who's coming to dinner they don't ask "Is Bobbie coming?" They ask, "Are Bobbie and Jesse coming." Also, my mom can't sleep well without my dad snoring beside her, which I think is kind of precious. Weird. But precious.

12. People are people. Honestly, my parents are some of the most liberal people I know. Which cracks me up. They do not judge people based on what they look like, who they love, what they do, how much money they make, etc. They genuinely judge people based on their character. They realize, and taught us, that everyone you meet is either a good person or their not, and you can't judge a book by it's cover. A clean cut dude can be a piece of shit and a dude covered in tattoos may be the best person you've ever met. You never know, so be kind to people and judge them based on who they really are and no who you assume they are.

13. Don't assume. I learned this as a young age with a pissed off Papa Campa. Listen, my dad hardly ever gets mad... but one time I made him mad because I assumed a few things and ran my mouth and someone got in trouble and... woops. I was young. Like real young. Like maybe 8 or so??? I remember him saying, "Do you know what 'assuming does?'" I said, "No..." Papa Campa, "It makes and ass out of you and me!" Welp, I have never forgotten that. I have tried really hard not to assume since that day. And clearly, it's solid advice.

14. We're well nurtured, not spoiled. Ok, Ok... We're probably a little spoiled. BUT my parents have taught us to be grateful. To appreciate what we have. To be thankful for what we're given. We were also taught to be respectful to others, and have manners. So, I guess what I'm trying to say is that we're spoiled, but we're not rotten. &&& for that I'm very grateful.

15. Laughter. My parents taught us how to joke, and how to laugh. Especially now that we're older we all have so much fun together!

16. Drinking is OK in moderation. Growing up my parents didn't do a lot of drinking. I don't remember having alcohol in the house until we got older. They taught us that drinking is OK, but should not be required to have fun or to function on a daily basis.

17. Grown children are still children. I know that my parents have gone above and beyond for us. They have dropped everything to go to Boise or even to Walla Walla. Sometimes for seemingly minor things, sometimes for big things. I know to some that seems odd. I know many parents that cut their kids off at 18. Not my parents. I think that I have been a lot more successful in my adult life, because of their support. I can take risks, and know that I have someone to fall back on. I know that no matter what I have someone to depend on.

18. Care for those you love. My parents drop pretty much everything to care for those they love. Especially their kids. I was 20 years old and getting my gallbladder out. My mom came up to Boise to take care of me prior to surgery. Both of my parents were there for my surgery. They skipped work and life to take care of me. My mom has taken care of countless people over the years. It's tiring. It's emotionally taxing. It's absolutely worth it and I believe it's a beautiful thing to care for those you love.

19. Confidence. My parents instilled confidence in us. I'm not sure how they did it... I do know that my parents never degraded us, who we are, what we looked like, or what we did. As long as we weren't breaking laws and were making good choices; we got to be our people. To discover our selves. They supported us all along these journeys. I believe that this instilled a lot of confidence in ourselves and decisions.

20. Use your voice. My parents taught us to use our voices. To stand up for ourselves when we need to. Being passive is not productive, and only ends up in pain. This applies to all aspects of life. Communication is key.

21. Buying presents is fun! Ok, so my parents really enjoy buying presents. It takes massive self control for them not to go nuts. We've discussed this. I love giving presents. I LOVE IT! There's nothing more fun then buying the perfect gift for someone, and watching their eyes light up!

22. How to take care of myself. I HATED cleaning the house. I HATED it. Mom and I had several screaming fights over it. I AM SO GLAD MY PARENTS PUSHED ME! I am so glad I can clean. I'm so glad I can cook. I'm so glad I can mow my lawn. I'm so glad that I know these things. I certainly don't take this for granted.

23. Protect your family, fiercely. We've talked about how family is important, but it goes beyond that. My parents have shown us that it's important to protect your kids and your family fiercely. I know that if anyone wronged me in a bad way, my parents and brother would be all over it. I know if someone wronged my brother, I would probably go crazy fast. These are genuinely the most important people in my life, and you protect things that important to you.

24. Things are just things and money is just money. My parents are not materialistic. We have things, yes. We were given things, yes. If my parents had to give it all up for the betterment of their family they would, and and one point they kind of did. I've wrecked cars... My parents reinforced that cars are replaceable. You won't hear my parents talk about how much something costs. You won't hear them asking for people to ever pay them back. In fact, you probably would have to fight them to pay them back. Money is just a thing. As long as we can eat, have a roof over our heads, and we have our family... Life is Good!

25. If you're going to do it, do it well. My parents have never let us settle for "OK". They always knew our potential, and expected it. They also demonstrated this throughout our lives. When they approach a project it ends well, so well.

26. Don't rush into things. Especially not relationships! My parents NEVER encouraged relationships when we were younger. They never said no, but they also never said, "Bring Billy to Thanksgiving!" I think that this is an EXCELLENT way to approach teenager and relationships. I can't count how many of my friends would have a hard time breaking up with high school boyfriends, because they knew families so well. HIGH SCHOOL BOYFRIENDS! How silly that there was so much pressure on such young kids. My parents never did that. They wanted us to live our lives, and here we are! They also never pressure me to have kids. Thank goodness. They love my puppies more than I do I think.

27. Early bird gets the worm. I secretly hate that they taught me this, and it's true. Ha! My parents are the people who are at the stores when they open. I kind of didn't like that very much for a period of time. Now, I try to go grocery shopping as early as possible to avoid the crowd. Costco opens at 10 AM. I'll be there. PLUS, then you get to take afternoon naps, because all your shopping gets done early.

28. How to drive a stick shift. Seriously, I did not want to ever drive a stick shift. Ever. But they made me. And thank goodness! I loved driving my stick shift cars! AND it's nice to know that if there's ever a situation where I need to drive someone else's car, I will be able to do it!

29. PRAY! My family may not be what some consider to be an extremely "religious family", but I was certainly raised believing in God. We were taught to pray and believe. My parents pray and believe. It has certainly impacted my life for the better.

30. Family time is important. We ate most dinners as a family, around the table growing up. We still eat meals together when I go home. Extended family parties are important. Family is important and spending time together is essential.

A Year Ago...

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about what my life was like a year ago, and what it is now. I'm sharing this because I hope people take 2 things away... 

1. I hope you understand that you don't have to get your life together before you get healthy. By getting healthy, you may find what you need to get your life together.

2. There are dark holes in life. You can sit in them and rot, or you can make moves to get out. If you make moves to get out, your life may turn out more amazing then you dreamed.

I took a job in Twin Falls at the end of July. I REALLY did not want to move to the Magic Valley, but figured that I would be here 2 years and leave. It was a good job, good supervisor, good benefits... What can 2 years hurt right? 

I decided to buy a house in the process, because (as I'm sure many of you know) I'm an extremist. If I'm going to move to a place I don't like, I'm going to buy a house. Yea, the logic is lost on me too. Ha! 

So, as I'm in the process of buying a house (which, by the way, can be a very stressful process) I'm also commuting from Gooding to Twin Falls every day, and living with my parents. Now, anyone ho knows my parents know that they are freaking fantastic. Seriously, amazing. Most people who has ever lived with their parents after living on their own for 5 years will tell you that even if your parents shit butterflies, it's not the ideal situation. I was miserable. Absolutely miserable. 

I was trying to learn a new job. I was a 23 year old girl who just graduated from college, taking the position of a social worker who had been in the job for almost 10 years and been in the field for far longer, I was making decisions that people who have worked in the juvenile justice system for 10+ years didn't always agree with, and I was trying to learn the quarks of a new district (because I was essentially trained in Ada County). It was stressful. At the same time I'm working on buying a house and getting a mortgage. I really had no idea what I was doing (thank goodness for my patient Realtor and banker). I was the definition of a hot mess. Maybe even minus the "hot" part because I was putting on weight fast. 

It got to the point where I was constantly fighting tears. I know that we've established that I cry a lot, but this was different. This was like, "I'm going to cry because I exist" type crying. I would sob on the 45 minute drive home every night. I even began having panic attacks, which I'd never had before. I had pretty much isolated myself from all my friends and had no interest in making new ones. 

I finally had a conversation/crying session with my mom, and told her that I needed anti-anxiety medication because I just couldn't handle any more. I remember telling her, "I have to start completely over in the one place I hate and the one place I never wanted to live." She certainly didn't argue with me, and we went and saw my doctor. I definitely self-diagnosed myself, but my doctor agreed and gave me 3 months worth of anti-depressants. I was determined to keep it to only 3 months. They helped. They helped so much. I really do encourage anyone who is experiencing a stressful time to really seek help, because it can help. But I digress. 

At the beginning of December I finally closed on my house. December 3rd to be exact. I was so excited, and so relieved! We painted my house and I moved in a few weeks before Christmas. I can't tell you how good it felt to be in my own space and be able to get settled.

I knew that I need to get the rest of my life together as well. I knew I need to start working out again, especially if I was going to be off my anti-depressants. At the end of December I bought an elliptical, and January 1st I started using it. My first day I did 10 minutes and almost died, but I kept at it. I also tried to change what I was eating. I continued with this through February. I was using the elliptical every day, about, and I had gotten up to 1 hour on my elliptical. I even got off the anti-depressants. 

Then I started to get bored. I started doing some other work outs, but I knew that if I didn't get someone to ride my ass soon I would be over it. I also knew that I needed friends. I had essentially gone over 6 months with very few social interactions. &&& I NEED my social interactions. I decided that I might be able to kill two birds with one stone. I started looking into gyms and personal training and my cousin told me about Cross-fit and that her friends did it in Twin. I looked into it. I was a little confused on how the pricing worked, and (no joke) thought it was a $400 a month activity. I figured that couldn't be right though, so I went in to check it out. I remember asking Kristin a few minutes into my first day "Ummm, it's only $90 a month right, not $90 a week?" I'm pretty sure laughed at me and assured me that I would not be paying $400 a month.

After the first day, I was hooked. I went straight to the store to buy better shoes and new work out clothes. DUH! Since then it's been nothing but up! Well I guess I've had my bumps, but really nothing major. I've met some awesome friends. Seriously, they are the funniest most caring group of people I've ever been around. I'm arguably in the best shape of my life. I don't think I could have done a Cross-fit work out like I did today, even when I was in the middle of a basketball season in high school. I'm stronger, and all around healthier. 

I've also changed my eating habits. I remember at one point telling Kristin "I will never be able to eat just meat and vegetables or do any kind of an extreme diet." In May I proved myself wrong and went 24 days without eating any food that wasn't Paleo. I've been working on maintaining that lifestyle since. Seriously though, I just ate Chicken and Brussels Sprouts dinner... and liked it!

Don't get me wrong... I still cry cuz I'm a freaking baby. This is at a normal place though. It's not painful crying. It's frustrated, happy, proud, and angry crying, but not overwhelming internal pain type crying.

I literally NEVER dreamed that I would EVER be in this place. I never thought my life would fall together here. I was planning to count my days until I could move. I never thought I'd be so freakin' strong and healthy, or even love it as much as I do. Seriously, I just did 195# dead lifts in a work out, because I can. I feel amazing. I'm starting my masters. And I honestly can't imagine being anywhere else in my life at this point. I will often say "Crossfit changed my life", and I think that to an extent it did. More importantly I changed my own life. I saw the hole I was in, and I fought to get out. I have worked freakin' hard this year to be in a better place, and here I am. 

And in closing... Big thanks to all my friends and family who have helped me along this journey. Those in Twin and those who aren't in Twin. I really have had good people by my side the whole way, even if I didn't always acknowledge it. 

CrossFit is More

Let me start out with mentioning that I have had a pretty rough few weeks at work. I've been told several times that I don't know how to do my job, threatened with a lawyer, and basically been made to feel guilty over things that are out of my control. Granted, this is from no one who really matters. My boss is my biggest supporter. I even have the two highest ups on the "food chain" backing me regarding all the decisions I've made. I know that my job is in no way in jeopardy. I know that I've made decisions that are not only necessary for the betterment of my clients but reflective of our beliefs and policies as an agency. BUT it still sucks. I like to be liked. I'm not going to lie. I don't like when people dislike me. I don't. I'm not sure who does. It sucks being told that you're doing things wrong. It sucks when your judgement is called into question because of your age or how long you've been working the job. It sucks. It hurts. It's frustrating. It's angering. It's maddening. It's ... Well... You get the picture.

During all of this I really am thankful for CrossFit for a few reasons...

1. I've been eating better, because eating good gives me a sense of control. My work days have seemed pretty out of control, but I can control what I put in my body. It helps me feel rooted, balanced, like I'm not going to explode and fly away.

2. Exercise is said to be as powerful as an anti-depressant. If this is true then CrossFit is like a straight up Xanax. (That's the super powerful one, right?)

BUT it's more than just those things, because I really believe that there's more to CrossFit then just exercise and eating right. Well, there is for me anyways.

3. CrossFit is the opportunity for success when I'm feeling like a failure. It's proving to myself that I can make progress, and hard work pays off.

4. CrossFit is a place where I know I'll be supported and encouraged. Not going to lie, some days you just need your friends to count your reps and push you. It also feels dang good when people notice your accomplishments, and their compliments are genuine. (Seriously, complements on my snatch make me feel way better about myself then complements about eyes. I worked for that snatch, my eyes are just a gift from God. :) Haha... but seriously. I work hard everyday and it's nice to hear people notice.)

5. CrossFit is a place for laughs. I know that I'm bound to laugh at some point. I know that I'm going to see the smiling faces of my friends. I know that we're going to suffer together and celebrate together.

6. CrossFit is where people see you at your WORST and still are glad to see you day after day! Seriously, I have probably shed more tears at the box then in my room in the last 6 months. I have sweat more in front of those people then in front of anyone ever. I have been frustrated, angry, disappointed, etc. They still love me. Or at least pretend, so that's good enough for me. :)

7. CrossFit is a place that I can  be myself. Fully and completely.

I guess what I'm trying to say, is that CrossFit is the time I get every day (except Thursday and Sunday rest days) that helps me to feel grounded. That allows me to rebuild my crushed confidence. That reminds me that there are good people in the world. CrossFit helps me survive. I know it sounds extreme, but it's true. I really believe that everyone needs their outlet. Especially those who in jobs like mine.

With that said, big shout out to my CrossFit friends who manage to make nearly every day at the box a refreshing and renewing experience. It's like you give me daily hugs, except not really. That's OK though, because we're all usually pretty sweaty... and well no need for things to get weird. :)

Cookin' Fails

I'm a good cook. A good freakin' cook. This week, however, I have FAILED at everything I've tried to make. Well, not that I didn't make it right... I just did not like it. 

It started Saturday when I made a creamy tomato chicken soup. It looked delicious, but there was WAY too much chicken and the chicken was dry. Very dry. 

Then Sunday I made homemade apple sauce and squash bread with Banana squash. The apple sauce had too much cinnamon. The squash bread was gross. Well, not gross. It just had a weird texture. It was made with almond flour. I've decided almond flower isn't my thing. 

Yesterday, I made banana squash and leek soup with bacon. It was OK, but really didn't hit the spot. 

Today, I made prosciutto wrapped fennel. First of all, prosciutto is EFFING EXPENSIVE! Seriously, it's about a dollar per paper thin slice. Well, not quite but pretty freaking close. And it's so salty! I really don't think I'll ever buy it again. Maybe my taste buds are simple, but I'd much rather have bacon. And fennel. Well... Yea... not my thing. &&& I made my super yummy honey roasted nuts and didn't use enough honey. 

WTF!!! 

Seriously, I'm so frustrated. I don't even want to eat because nothing sounds good. I know I need to eat though, so I do. Even if I don't like it. 

I'm kind of frustrated and just need some good food. 

Tomorrow, I'm going to health-ify KFC's mashed potato bowl. Stay tuned. Hopefully tomorrow is a success! 

Bountiful Basket!!!

For those of you who have never heard of Bountiful Baskets, you should really check them out. It's as easy as clicking HERE. I got my first basket today and I'm STOKED!!! Here are the goods... 

Does that look fantastic or what??? &&& ALL  of this (including a bunch of Bananas that got cut out) was only $15!!! There are a few extra fees ($3 for first timers and $4 for processing). Still though. Try to get all this stuff at the grocery store for that price. PLUS, you never know what you're going to get, so it's the perfect excuse to try out new recipes and really expand your Paleo recipes. BOOM! 

This week there were these little fellows... 

I had NO idea what they were. Shout out to my Facebook friends who helped. They're persimmons. Based on some Pinterest searching I'm going to try to make Persimmon Chicken. I'm pretty excited about the situation. Wish me luck. 

I also got lentils. I first thought they were leeks. I had never had either. Turns out they weren't leeks. I'm a bit nervous to try those, but my dear friend Ruth guided me towards Prosciutto wrapped leeks. That sounds safe right? Imma try it!!! 

With the rest of the pile I'm still brain storming what to do. I definitely think tonight's snacky will be a yummy fruit salad. Mmmm... So much yumminess in this pile. 

I'll keep you updated on what I do and how it turns out!!! 

I did already start in on the loot... 

My favorite thing ever. YUMMM!!!

Never Done...

Not gonna lie.

Not happy with the way I look in the one WOD pic I saw for today. I'm dreading all the others.

However, there are a few things I've learned in Crossfit.

1. You're never "done". Just about the time that you think you're done Kristin will say "Good Job! Now, make sure your hamis are loaded and your core is hallow" or "Stefani, that was a nice curl, but now I need you to clean the weight." SERIOUSLY, THERE ARE JUST SO MANY RULES!!!

2. The only person who can make changes is you. Everyone else is there to help, but no body can force you to squat lower, run faster, or lift heavier. You have to do it all by yourself.

3. Everyone has their kryptonite! (Is that how you spell that???) Seriously, even my most super heroic friends. (We have quite a few that I'm pretty sure could move buildings if they tried... Maybe we should try!)

What does that all have to do with me not being pleased with those pictures???

WELL, that means it's time to get back on the straight and narrow. There ain't not "bulking season for this girl". Well... there was, but it was like 24 years long... I think I probably have another 24 years before I can justify another bulking seasons.

Like most things in Crossfit, I am going to attempt the impossible!!! I am going to try to be on the straight and narrow through the holidays!!! (Oooooooo... Ahhhhhhh....) I promised myself that by 25 I would look better than 24 (So far I'm doing pretty well... but I'm not done!), and by golly I don't like breaking promises. Especially to myself. Nobody else likes when I break promises to myself either, because it usually ends in tears. Ha.

Anyways, I think that the only way to really conquer the holidays is to set myself some rules. I am one of those people who thrives in structure. If I just say "I'm going to eat clean" I will make sure there's not dust on my ice cream before I eat it. (This is best done by eating an entire carton at one time.) SO I have to give myself rules to avoid the previous situation. I wish someone else would give me rules though, but I suppose when you become an ad*lt (I hate that word) you have to have some self discipline or some shit like that. Now, if you see me being a cheater, cheater pumpkin (pie) eater, please throw something at my head. #KTHANKS.

1. I can only have planned cheats. This means that I can't just be goin' around cheatin' cuz I feel like it. I have to plan my cheats. For example: Next weekend I'm pumpkin carving with my familia (that's family, for all of you non-Mexicans... Hehehe). We're going to eat taco soup (straight from the homeland), and by golly I will be eating it with all the fixin's. However, tomorrow I can't just go buy ice cream cuz I feel like it. It is not planned!!! Let's say that I have to plan at least a week a head of time and put it on my calendar. BOOM!

2. In situations where I am randomly not in a good-food-friendly environment I have to make the very best choices possible. This means if my boss comes to town and we go to lunch, I can't order pizza just because. I have to get a salad. OR if I'm at some kind of Christmas Party I will choose foods that best match my health goals, and will avoid things like brownies, candy, cookies, etc.

3. I can eat candy ONLY on Halloween Day. 

4. I have a 3 day window around Thanksgiving and Christmas. Meaning, I can cheat the day before, the day, and the day after. After that it's back on track. (Don't worry, I will undo all progress in those 6 days.)

5. I can drink on New Years cuz I like New Years. #DONTJUDGEME

6. I will prepare Paleo friendly foods to take with me when possible and appropriate. 

So, that's the deal with myself. I'm not going to weigh myself before or anything like that. I'm simply going to do this, because I want to feel good about myself. I know that if I eat well and train hard then I will see the results I want!

Feel free to join!

PS: My other goal by my birthday is to jump on a box. Without crying. Ha! To do this I wrote myself a box jumping program. It starts out ridiculous, so don't judge me when I'm at the box jumping 2 inches. It's all part of the process. And I will jump on a mother effing box.

Paleo Pulled Pork and Coleslaw

I know, I know... It sounds too good to be true. 

You're right. It is. 

But it's almost true! And I'm pretty certain it could be true with the right tweeks. 

Here's how it went though... 

PULLED PORK - This recipe came from my mom. Her recipe called for a roast that's about 6lbs. Since I am one person, I got a smaller roast and adjusted the measurements. I also changed out the brown sugar for honey. (Fun Fact: She served this at my high school graduation!)

2.5 Pork Picnic Roast

1 Can Tomatoes

1/4 Cup Honey

1/4 Cup Vinegar

***The Not Paleo Part***

1/4 Cup Worcestershire Sauce

1/4 Cup Soy Sauce

Take all that stuff and throw it in the crock-pot. I left mine in for a bout 6 hours. My guess is that you can sub out the Worcestershire Sauce and Soy Sauce BUT I was too lazy to research if they were Paleo or not. I figure if that's the worse thing I eat I'm doing A-O-K! 

COLESLAW - I used this Paleo Mayo recipe from Gone for a Run. I did tweek it a bit. I did not use the mustard seed. I HATE MUSTARD! I also pretty much used this Coleslaw recipe from the primal food blog, but I tweeked it. 

1 Bag of Coleslaw mix (I am not a good chopper)

5 Tbs Paleo Mayo

1 (plus a little) Tbs Honey (Do you like my exact measurements?)

2 Tbs Apple Cider Vinegar

Salt to Taste

I mixed all of that yumminess together. 

Now, for the grand finally! 

Obviously, I  did not put this pulled pork on buns. Instead I married my two masterpieces... 

Step One... 

Step 2...

Pork on Top!!! 

Seriously, it was so yummy. I highly recommend it!!! Even if it is only... 

I'm sure you bright souls can figure out a paleo pulled pork recipe. 

What are your posts?

This is my last post about all the political things going on on Facebook. Seriously, I have to get all this frustration with the human race out of me. I've decided that I will be deleting and/or hiding the posts of people. Now, I'm not doing it because people have different opinions than me. I think that's great. If you have a different opinion good for you! As long as you're able to give valid reasons for your opinions. Opinions based on fact, are fantastic. Opinions based on information you're being fed through the media shows that your are ignorant, and willing to believe anything. That my friends, is dangerous.

I challenge all of you to not share articles unless you can find at least 3 articles from legitimate sources that share the same facts. Think about it. When things are true. When there is something major that happens in our country there are multiple sources all reporting the same facts. Base your opinions on facts, not on the opinions of others. Don't let others dictate who you are. 

It's more than that though. 

People post so many hateful things. Hateful things against people. Hateful things against religion. Hateful. Hateful. Hateful. 

I don't know if people don't think through things, or if they don't care. Quite frankly I really think that some people are uneducated and refuse to look at the other side of things. They simply say things because that's what they were raised to believe. 

Now, I'm not saying that all people who have a different opinion are uneducated. I know many educated people with different opinions. People who are able to articulate their believes in an educated non-hateful way. If that's the case, speak on! 

Just know that as of right now the only people sharing their opinion are people who are making themselves seem ignorant, uneducated, hateful, money hungry, elitist, etc. What are your posts saying about you? 

PS: If we're not friends soon... your posts are probably not good. 

Thankful

So I'm currently blogging in the bath. Totes weird, huh? 

This is what OC does when I'm in the bath. He hops up there and makes sure the bubbles haven't eaten me. Isn't he sweet???

Anyways, there really is a reason I'm blogging in the bath. I kind of had a reality check. These happen to me periodically. It usually when my life gets "soooo hard". Please, sense the sarcasm because I realize I live a good freaking life. 

Lately, I've been frustrated about life in general. I just want everything! I want enough money that I can do what I want. I want new boots. I want some dude attention. I want people to do things my way. I want to do my work outs my way. I want to be faster. I want to be stronger. I want to eat like shit and still look good. I want froyo. I want single friends who get me. I want to party. I want to dance. I want. I want. I want.

Gah! I annoy myself I think! Then I don't get what I want and I get pissy!

Here's the thing. I feel like in our society we're taught that contentment will get you no where. You need to always be fighting and striving for the next thing. &&& don't you dare think it'll come around. Nope. You better go get it, and do what it takes to get it. Or else. 

Now, don't get me wrong... There's some reality to that. If things need to change, they won't change with out a little effort on your part (typically). BUT who says that you have to he discontent with every part of your life??? Seriously, if you're wishing for more in every part of your life you will be so freaking miserable!!! 

I think I need to be more content with my life as a whole. I have a freaking good life! I have good people in my life! I am so, so, so blessed! 

I've decided that I need to stop wanting. I need to work towards goals in a few areas, but be content as a whole. 

 I'm going to do this by being thankful. My goal is to get a small notebook that will fit in my purse. Everyday day until my 25th birthday I'm going to write down 5 things I'm thankful for. When I want I will read through those things. That's 515 things to be thankful for! 

The rules: 

It has to be applicable to my day.

It will be done in moments of frustration, anger, or wanting as applicable. 

No repeats. 

I will be specific! What I'm thankful for and why. 

Bam! This is going to be good! I'll keep you updated!

Stop Attacking Me!

I'm beginning to notice... People really have a hard time looking outside themselves. I don't know if it's intentional or if it's habit. Either way I find it quite... Disgusting.

Here's a few things that I've seen recently that makes me think that we as Americans need to re-evaluate a little  bit.Call me crazy, but I choose to believe that not everything that happens in this world is a personal attack on me. Now, the "my logic" portion is not based on fact but on my own logic. So, here are two major examples where I think that people took things more personally than necessary. 

Issue: The Affordable Health Care Act requires people to buy insurance. 

People: OMG, THE GOVERNMENT IS TELLING ME TO BUY INSURANCE! They don't know me! They can't tell me what to do! Even though me, and my family have hand insurance for the last 20 years because I understand the benefits and have a good job, but if I want to stop having insurance I don't want my government telling me what to do!

My Logic: Huh, I remember in college that they required you to have insurance, and if you didn't get your on insurance you had to  purchase their plan. There must be a reason that they make you buy insurance. Perhaps, it's because if you don't have insurance to help pay for medical expenses someone else is going to have to pick up the bill. Who would pick up the bill if someone without insurance was diagnosed with cancer? Hmmm... Well they would have to cover it if they could, but then they might go bankrupt. My guess is that the doctors don't just say "Whoops, they went bankrupt. We don't need paid!" Nope, someone is going to pay. That's why the price of treatments increase for everyone else. My guess is that some how the government even picks up part of that check. Though I'm not sure of those logistics. My assumption is that it's far cheaper for EVERYONE in the long run if people would just buy insurance. I think that maybe shouldn't be required to buy insurance, but perhaps if you choose to not buy insurance you should not be allowed to receive any medical treatment unless you can prove that you can pay up front. Get in a car wreck? Better be able to hand the ambulance your credit card while your on your way to the hospital. Better hope it doesn't get declined or you're bleeding out on the side of the road. Get cancer but don't have insurance? Well, you probably don't know you have cancer because you can't go to the doctor unless you can pay for it out of your pocket prior to. Oh, that's cold and heartless? So, you're telling me you want medical care but don't want to pay for it??? Stop asking for handouts!!!

PS: I would assume that statistically most people who don't want to have to by health insurance actually have it and have had it for a long period of time. 

Issue: The school is requiring a doctor's note before I can send my kid with a packed lunch. 

People: OMG, I'm pulling him from that school! How does this school have a right to tell me what I'm feeding MY kid! I might as well home school my kid! The school obviously does not appreciate my efforts to make my kid healthy! 

Me: So, if your kid has a medical condition you should probably just get a note. Even if they don't, call a doctor and get a note. I'm sure most doctors would write a note saying, "Due to preventatives measures being taken by this mother to ensure the health of her child, her child needs to bring lunches to school from home." That seems pretty simple. I'm sure I could call at least 2 doctors right now who would do that and probably not even charge. Perhaps, instead of teaching your kid to run away from adversity and "pull your kid from school" you could teach your kid to approach this situation in a productive manner. Call the teacher and say, "Hey, I got this note from school. I plan to get a doctors note, but want to make sure there's not concerns with what I pack little Timmy." My guess is you'd hear something like this, "No, the meals you pack are amazing! I'm jealous and try not to steal them. However, not all parents pack their children healthy lunches. There are children who come to school with leftover McDonalds or a lunch box filled with candy. We are making attempts to help the children be healthy, so we are trying to eliminate these types of lunches. However, we cannot target those families, so we have to make a rule that applies to all. Please know this isn't a personal attack." Badda Boom Badda Bing! Problem solved! 

PS: How you react to situations will impact your kids. Please for the sake of everyone in the whole world do not teach your kids to "run" when there is adversity. Do not teach kids that they don't have to follow the same rules as everyone else because you said. That teaches them they are some how superior. Even little things like this have big impacts on kids. Teach them to run, and they'll run. Teach them they get to pick and choose the rules they follow, they will pick and choose the rules. Be an adult and set an example. Don't throw a fit. More on this in the future I'm sure. 

Anyways, so there's a couple things. Mind you there are many, many more of these situations. Don't take things so personal. Think outside of the box. Understand the world is probably not out to get you. It's out to get all of us. It's equal opportunity. :)

Soccer Ball

A few weeks ago I was talkin' to some other young, single ladies in the Tragic Valley. We were CRACKING up, because we're freaking funny AND because we all agree that the man scene around here SUCKS!!!

They had red a few previous blogs. Mainly this one. We were laughing, because the kinda men I had named were the kinda men they were finding.

Then we laughed, because our standards slowly deteriorate as time goes one. At one point I said "Sandra* your standards are so low I can kick them with a soccer ball!!!" (Name changed for the protection of single ladies who aren't blogging their lives, and thus ensuring their singlehood for life.)

I've been thinking about this a bit since then, and have decided I have a "Standards Cycle". Now, at work we talk a lot about "cycles". There are "cycles" kids get in for drug use, criminal behavior, and things of the sort. We talk about how they make the decision to make a mistake, how they react after, etc.

NOW this is not exactly what we make them do, nor have I worked half as hard on this as they do. I just feel like a "cycle" describes this best. So, ENJOY!

My Standard Cycle

*** It all begins with me movin' on from the flavor of the year. (Year, because that's about how often I find someone that I actually talk to for longer than a week. Ha!) ***

Day 1: Screw him! I want a man who has a good job. Has his life together. Is nice. Is fun. Loves his family. I want a man, not a boy. I want him to be confident, and hot. He NEEDS to be SMOKIN' hot! I mean I Crossfit with some hot ass men, and I don't want anything less. AND he must eat healthy and Crossfit, too!

Day 30: ***Man of potential interest located*** Wow, look at him! He has a good job, and his life together? He's nice, he's fun, loves is family, and damn if that's not a man I don't know what is! He's confident and SMOKIN' hot! And he eats healthy. He doesn't Crossfit, but he works out. He'll Crossfit by the time I"m done with him. Oh... wait... he's married??? Well, good for his wife!!! At least I know there are good men out there. I'm sure I'll find another one soon.

Day 60: ***Another man of potential interest located*** Oh, hey! He seems nice and fun! He has a good job and loves his family. I would consider him a man. He's not "smokin' hot" by definition, but he eats good and works out. I'm sure we can take care of that uni-brow pretty easily once I have him under my spell. He's not interested??? Hmmm... Must have some uni-brow lovin' lady on the line. It's cool. I couldn't be that lady for him.

Day 90: *** Yet another man of potential interest located. *** Hmmm... He's nice and fun. He has a good job. He seems to love his family. I think that the odd shape of his face probably has made him quite the man. That's a lot to overcome. He doesn't EXACTLY eat healthy or exercise regularly... We can work on it. Let's give it a go. Huh, he's not interested? Probably gay...

Month 4: ***Man in 100 foot radius*** Well he looks like a man. Ummm... He's funny and and loves his family. He has a steady job, even if it is only 20 hours a week at McDonalds. He's been working those same 20 hours for the last 10 years! That's dedication! For the rest of the week he sits on his butt and eats McDonalds... He doesn't smell too bad though.... Really??? He doesn't want me??? Because I don't look like Miley Cyrus??? Huh...

Month 6: ***Man within 100 yard radius*** Well, he must love his family, because he still lives with his parents. He says it's temporary though. Temporary for the last 10 years. He's just about ready to fly the coop though. His mom, you know, she just really loves him. He doesn't necessarily have a "job" but he helps his mom with the lawn and laundry. And man, does he clean some whites! He is fun though!

Month 8: ***Breathing Man*** He's breathing and interested! Nailed it! He's perfect!

DISCLAIMER::: I actually have known a few cool dudes in my life. And never has "breathing" been as bad as it sounds, but 99% of the time when things end I think "Uh... what was the point of that? We are so different that there was no chance that was going to last longer than a few months!" So, none of y'all flavors of the year go getting all butt hurt.

Opportunity

I've decided I don't give a crap about politics. I care about people. I care that people are taken care of. I care that people have opportunity. I care about kids. I care that they eat. I care that they have clothing. I care that they are given opportunities for success. I care about people.

I don't care who is president. I care if the president cares about people. I don't care who in congress. I care that congress does what's in the best interest of people. 

I don't give two shits about money. I care that people are able to feed, clothe, and put a roof over their children head. I care that if a kid is sick they can go to the doctor. 

That is my "political" stance. 

That being said I think people need to recognize the advantages they had at life. I think that people need to realize that not all "boot straps" are created equal. Some people are pulling at mile long boot straps. Others are pulling at inch long boot straps. Here are the advantages I had, that not everyone has. 

I knew I would get fed 3 meals a day as a kid, so I could focus on school instead of my hungry stomach. 

I knew my parents could afford to keep a roof over my head, so I never stayed up at night wondering if we'd be evicted again. 

I knew that my parents would clothe me and those clothes would be of high quality, so I never worried if kids at school would make fun of me.

I knew that my parents would provide me with most everything I needed/wanted so I never felt the need to steal. 

I knew my parents would take good care of my little brother, so I never had to worry about taking care of him or protecting him. 

I was never cold in the winter, because I had warm clothes and my parents ran the heater.

I knew if I was sick I could go to the doctor, because I had insurance. 

I knew that if there was ever need for operations, x-rays, or scans I'd get them, because we had insurance and my parents valued our health.

My parents valued education, so I was always supported in my educational endeavors. 

My parents wanted me to have an opportunity to enjoy sports and be a kid, so they did whatever it took to allow me to be involved. 

My parents loved and supported me, so I didn't have to search for that from somewhere else. 

My parents worked hard and provided well, so I could go to college after high school instead of staying home to help support the family. 

I knew my parents would and could help in a financial pinch, so I could go to college full time and only work part time. 

I had parents who supported me my entire senior year, so I could devote myself to an internship (which turned into a job.)

I bought my first house at 23, because I had family to help and guide me towards making sound financial descisions. 

This list could go on... 

Don't get me wrong... I worked hard to get to where I am and work hard to maintain. However, my boot straps were only an inch. While other kids were wondering when they'd eat next, trying to protect their siblings, hoping they'd have a home the next day, dropping out of school to support their siblings, freezing in threadbare clothes during the winter, etc... I was living a care free life. I was throwing fits about not going on mission trips to Guatemala!!! (True story) I think people need to realize there is a harsh reality for some people. Some overcome that reality, but some struggle to do so. I think that people need to realize that we are not all born equal, and many will NEVER understand the struggles people have gone through.

Call me crazy, but maybe if people would stop judging other people and would be a supportive voice more people would overcome negative circumstances. I think that the first step is to give kids hope and opportunity. The first step to giving kids hope and opportunity is to stop bashing their families. If you tell a kid their family is "crap", they think they are "crap", thus becoming "crap". 

So, maybe people should stop being so judgmental, realize there's situations beyond their realm of comprehension, and simply be grateful that they do not have the struggles of others.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not socialist. I don't think that everyone should have to divvy their money among the rest. I think that the ability to earn money is great motivation. I do, however think that people who have opportunities need to stop thinking their so great and judging those who haven't had opportunities. I also think it wouldn't hurt for them to go as far as to be encouraging to those who haven't had opportunities. You don't have to give them money. Or hand outs. Just stop being freaking ass holes. You're talking about human beings. 

Funk-Be-Gone

Man Oh Man I have been in one nasty funk. Seriously. TERRIBLE!!! 

It was about a month of not caring much about anything. I didn't feel like being social. I didn't want to eat well. I didn't want to work out. I didn't really want to do much at all. 

I'm not sure what sparked it. I think it may have been a combination of work stress and burn out and contentment regarding working out. This is totally what I do. I go at something 200% and I burn myself out. I think that's what I did health wise. I ate and did CrossFit like it was my effing job. Well, maybe not that much, but freaking rocked it for a solid 3-4 months. It was a little too hardcore. A little too overwhelming. And it brought me to a point of contentment with my body. I am easily in the best shape that I've been in, well, EVER! Even in high school I wasn't this strong. Though I was smaller at one point. I have been liking my reflection in the mirror. I've been liking what I see, and I struggle to imagine any thing more. I can't imagine myself more fit. More in shape. I think that stunted me. I kind of felt like "I'm done!" And well work stress is kind of self explanatory. A necessary evil. 

I'm here to tell you though... THE FUNK IS GONE!!! I'm not sure what actually tipped the scale, but I'm feeling pretty freaking motivated right now. I know there there are a few contributing factors, so here is my recipe for Funk-Be-Gone! Well, as good of a recipe as possible at the moment. It's like trying to figure out a recipe after only taking a bite of what is supposed to be the finished product. Tough!!! 

FUNK-BE-GONE

From the Kitchen of Stefani

Servings: As much as you need. 

Cook time: 2-6 Weeks

NOTE: All measurements vary based on the person. 

Friends (who know and support your health/fitness goals)

Perseverance

Logical Thinking

Communication 

Insight

Things That Inspire You

Decisiveness

Step 1: Be sure to take a BIG gulp of perseverance. You can't give up just because you don't "feel like it". If your mom gave up on you because she didn't "feel like" being a parent then you'd be worse off than you are now! You have to keep going through the motions. Fake it until you make it. Make sure to be communicating with you friends about your funk. They can provide external motivation. 

Step 2: Look at yourself. Your life. Your days. What is it that you feel your missing? Gotta have a little insight. Are you missing alone time? Are you missing friends? Are you feeling the need to further yourself? Are you feeling lonely? Are you angry? Why? Do whatever it takes (within reason) to work on that part of your life. I started the process of getting my masters. I took some extra time for myself. I cleaned my house. (For real a dirty house throws me off, but I hate cleaning!!!)

Step 3: Make sure your still keeping your friends involved. Ask them for help. 

Step 4: Seek inspiration. Look for things that might inspire you. Watch videos that might inspire you. Read quotes. Seek inspiration wherever you can get it. 

Step 5: MAKE UP YOUR FREAKING MIND!!! Set some goals. Decide that you are going to accomplish those goals. Call your friends again and ask them to help you!!! 

For me this turned into a 7 day Paleo Challenge with my friends, and a month of October where I will not cheat unless it's pre-planned. Basically I won't impulsively cheat. And after watching some squat videos I've decided that my squat is about to get an overhaul. I was even so motivated today that I still WODed even though I forgot my shoes!!! Yup, I WODed in shitty shoes and took that shit off and just wore my socks at one point.

Feelin' amazing. About to look amazing. Excited to see what my body can be!!!

PS: I also would like to say that there is NO WAY IN HELL I would have EVER stuck with any of this if it wasn't for my CrossFit fam, and my friends. I really think that paying to go to CrossFit or paying for a trainer is 100% worth it. Unless you have some super motivated friends. Plus, if your lucky (like I am) your trainer/coach/fellow CrossFitters will be come your best friends and biggest fans. 

I FREAKIN' LOVE CROSSFIT!!!

Welfare

IF I HAVE TO SEE ONE MORE EFFING MEME THAT SAYS "You should have to pass a drug test for welfare, because I had to pass a drug test to earn it" OR "I want a picture of the ghetto family I'm supporting." I'M GOING TO FUCKING LOSE MY GOD DAMN MIND!!! 

I can't decide if people are heartless or idiots. Maybe a combination of the two? Or maybe just ignorant to reality. 

OK, that's probably kind of mean. But I really do feel that way. 

I get it. People misuse the welfare system. It's true. There are people out there who take advantage and who teach their kids to take advantage and they take advantage. There are people with brand new cars who are on welfare. It's unfortunate. You should know that whether you know it or believe it or not there are limits on actual welfare money. There is a 5 year per-person federal cap on actual welfare. Now, there are other money sources such as disability or unemployment that may allow for more time. But actual welfare tops out at 5 years. Food Stamps are a whole nother story, but we won't get into that. You can tell me I'm lying, but I was trained in this shit. I kind of know a little bit about what I'm taking about. 

SURPRISE, there are actual people who need to access welfare for one reason or another. It is there for a reason. I think that everyone should pray that they don't have to ever access welfare, because it is definitely not rich making. BUT if you have a family that needs to live and you don't want to be homeless, you will access it. Or I hope you will at least. If you're so prideful you're willing to make your family homeless instead of accessing government funds I don't think you deserve your family. Just saying. 

Now let's address MEME #1... 

"I think people should take drug tests." 

Yes, you're probably right. That would be logical, but do you know what happens by requiring this??? Kids don't eat. Kids don't live in any kind of decent housing. Kids don't have clothing. Kids come to people like me and say, "I stole because my mom can't afford clothes for me." Yes, I've heard that. You are hurting KIDS. Kids who are innocent. Kids who already got the short end of the stick. You are creating kids who re-enter the cycle. You are eliminating opportunities for them. 

Oh, excellent idea! We'll just take these kids away from their parents!!! Uh... that isn't how things work. Kids want to be with their parents. Plain and simple. Kids want to be with their drug using inappropriate parents. Also, it is actually VERY difficult to get kids taken out of the home. It does not happen as often as people "think" it should happen. There aren't enough foster homes in the world, and literature says that kids are better off with their parents no matter how bad their parents are. So, in short, kids are not going to be taken out of homes. It is unrealistic. It's unlikely. It's not going to happen. 

MEME #2

"Picture of the Ghetto Family"

First of all  your taxes go to so many things, that you probably give your "adopted family" a total of a couple bucks a pay check. If that much. Maybe if you're making a million dollars a year that's different, but most of the people who want a picture aren't. Also, you don't know who the people on welfare are. It's not like they have stamps on their head. Maybe you're assuming people are on welfare, but their not. Maybe you're assuming people aren't on welfare but they are. Maybe assuming makes and ass out of me and you. I'm thinking the last one is correct. Basically it's a pretty freaking arrogant statement to make considering chances are most people aren't even aware of how the system works. 

Again you are only hurting kids. You are putting this stigma onto kids, when it's not their fault their parents access welfare. You are teaching your kids to single these kids out. You are creating kids who live into what everyone thinks they should. You are not allowing kids to see their potential. You are shaming kids for something they should not be shamed for. 

FINALLY, if the government wasn't taking taxes to help these families then they would use that money for something else. Stop freaking whining. It's not going to stop. You will always pay taxes. You can either throw a fit about it your whole life or accept it and move on. 

FINALLY, FINALLY maybe everyone should worry about themselves, and not spend so much time worrying about others and how they get their money.